Would you please make a paragraph using the words listed below?

Question

I’m looking for correct sentence structure, quirky humor - make me laugh! You may change the tense, order; add a prefix, suffix, etc.

Opossum
Favor
Sluggish
Culinary Institute of America
Content
Brothel
Erupted
Stalactite
Queen
Gentleman
Squid
8-track

Please note this isn’t for homework. I’m probably older than your mother!

Answer 1

Madame Esmeralda considered herself to be "Queen of All She Surveyed". Not much of a title actually, considering that her kingdom was a small, rundown brothel tucked away in a back alley running behind the Culinary Institute of America. The brothel's only window faced the blank, brick wall of the school which was lined by it's many overflowing and pungent trashcans. Madame Esmeralda considered these waste bins to be the bane of her existence, and the reason behind the brothel's recent sluggish business. It was midsummer, and marauding raccoons and opossums had raided the cans, leaving mouldering heaps of culinary remains - fish heads, banana peels, squid tentacles and soggy tomatoes - to rot in the street. The school would not cooperate with her many requests to have the bins moved. Madame felt forced to call in a favor from a certain gentleman with whom she was intimately acquainted. He had a talent for solving problems from major ones like collecting back payment from customers, to minor ones such as procuring obscure 1970's porn soundtracks on 8-track cassette. He was very handy, really, but she hesitated to call upon him. So often violence erupted in his wake, leaving unidentifiable goo hanging like stalactites from tree branches, ceilings, or electrical wires. Still, business was business and if the school would not meet her halfway, then she must act.

Answer 2

The sluggish squid and the oppossum were content in listening to their favored 8-tracks. In fact, the squid and the opossum would have so much fun listening to their disco music on the way to the Culinary Institute of America that they would already have erupted into laughter as they got into the school's parking lot. Before they entered the school, they realized from the stalactites hanging from the roof that that region of the state also got freezing snow. When their classes for the day ended they decided to go to the brothel, "A Gentleman's Club". Queens were not aloud, but there was plenty of adult content to keep them amused until the early morning hours. By the time they left, the Squid and Opossum were no longer sluggish.

Answer 3

The Queen of the Culinary Institute of America made a contest for the best recipe for 2006. The winner of the contest would get a free pass to a famous brothel in the kingdom of Stalactite, Maine. Several people entered the contest. The day of the contest, ten finalist contestants who had entered their recipes, were required to prepare their dishes in front of the Queen. One gentleman was preparing a recipe using opossum. Another, was preparing a recipe with squid as the main ingredient. As the gentleman tested the gravy for the opossum, he noticed that the gravy was a bit sluggish. He decided what he needed to liven up the gravy was some old music from the 60s. The Queen had her servants fetch the royal 8-track player, and they promptly played some CCR. The gentleman fixing the squid thought it unfair that the Queen would favor the opossum chef in such a way, and the whole affair erupted in a huge row. In an effort to regain order in the court, the Queen announced that everyone was a winner. Everyone got to sample the opossum and the squid, and all were content.



The end.

Answer 4

Once upon a time there was a very sluggish opossum. He wanted the Queen of animal town to do him a favor. He was currently attending the Culinary Institute of America and was not a content gentleman. He had recently been delivering fresh squid to the town brothel, when a mugger stole an 8-track tape out of his pocket. The 8-track tape was very valuable because it was old and they don't make them anymore. The tape, more importantly, had information on it regarding how to make a cake in the shape of a stalactite, and he really needed it to be found. So he asked the Queen of animal town to send out her army and find the 8-track tape and return it to him as soon as possible. He really wanted to win the cake baking and decorating contest that he had entered. The sluggish opossum soon received a knock on his door. It was the head of the Queens army. He had found the 8-track tape, and had come to return it. The sluggish opossum went back to the Culinary Institute of America, baked his Stalactite cake, and ended up winning the contest. Joyous laughter erupted form the sluggish opossum after he won the contest. He lived happily ever after. The End.

Answer 5

Gentleman Elton John made an 8 track about a queen to be.It was inspired by the erupted society that favors media that exposes stories as exciting as a squid making it with a call girl in a brothel in amish country,with sluggish apprehension I would like to hear about the formation of certain meaningful subjects as the favor the culinary institute does for our society.They are about as exciting to the paparrazi as a stalactites growth, but both provide more intellect.

Answer 6

Oppossum

Some favor a sluggish opossum, I, however, having graduated from the CIA (Culinary Institute of America), prefer one with content. With some pizazz. An uppity little critter, if you will. I like the challenge of getting them into the pan. It reminds me of the time I was a bathroom steward at a very posh brothel in Queens. A man had just erupted while being pleasured and, being quite the virile man, debris was left upon the ceiling like stalactites in caves in New Mexico. I was called in to clean it up, but I reminded them I was the bathroom steward and the private rooms were not within my boundries of work. But, being the gentleman that I am, I agreed to clean up the mess, provided I was given full rein of the kitchen for the night. My intentions were to make 'possum for supper, but someone had used up the last measely portions I had in roadkill helper the night before. So, I settled for some smelly old squid, which tastes just like 'possum! The time spent in the kitchen was well worth having to clean up the mess, in that I was not only able to make a fabulous dish and enjoy every little piece, but also danced away while doing so listening to 'The Dancing Gormet's Evening Classics' on the old 8-track player inadvertantly left behind in the broom closet by the previous owners - Lefty's Tavern and Supper Club.



Ah, the memories of that wonderful night. What I wouldn't trade for a night like that again!

Glad to see you're back at it! Be sure to continue to put the link on your 360 page so I can always find yours! Thanx...

Answer 7

I was shocked when Queen Opossum erupted from the brothel with a sluggish gentleman who looked like a squid favoring his stalactite and carrying an 8-track called "The Culinary institute of America".

Now i am content.

Answer 8

As a gentlemen I did my queen a favor and dined with her at the brothel. The culinary institute of America was serving opossum. Foghat was playing on the 8-track when the squid was served. Suddenly my stomach was feeling a little sluggish. Unsure of the contents of my stomach, vomit erupted like a stalactite. I sued and now am head of the Institute........Oh well, I tried.

Answer 9

The GENTLEMAN had a SLUGGISH walk as he made his way over to the CULINARY INSTITUE OF AMERICA. He would be facing his students for the first time today, and he intended to make them enjoy the class. As the students filed in the classroom, the man made an announcement. "Today, class, we are going to be making a meal for the QUEEN. She is visiting the BROTHEL today and would like to have a delicious meal to take with her." There was a pause, some funny looks, then an ERUPTION of whispers, until the man started to talk again. "I'm going to do you all a FAVOR and let you listen to this 8-TRACK tape on how to cook an OPOSSUM and SQUID medley. Please listen to the CONTENT carefully." After a few hours, the meal was complete, and delicious, even though it looked like a broken piece of stalactite. The meal was soon delivered to the queen. All was going swell...until she took a bite!!



I hope you enjoyed my story on how the Queen will face her death. Lol!

Answer 10

My aardvark and I were in the brothel waiting on our dinner from the Culinary Institute of America. While we were waiting the Queen erupted from her sluggish slumber into a frenzy of activity. On looking up, I realized her behavior changed because of the gentleman entering the room. He was wearing a squid on his shoulder and asked if we had an 8-track available for his use. As he asked for the favor, I pointed out the 8-track behind the stalactite in the corner, and cautioned him to be careful because the content of his tape might be inappropriate for my young aardvark.

Answer 11

The sluggish gentleman wiped the erupted opossum off his windshield before turning off the Queen 8-track. 'The Culinary Institute of America would be better served as a brothel!' he thought to himself with content. 'To think they were doing me a favor by serving me a squid that looked like a stalactite!'

Answer 12

A gentleman working at the Culinary Institute of American was content with cooking squid and garnishing it with the flim flam from opposums. He was a brothel who frequently erupted into the Queen's sluggish stalactite. They usually did the thingimajig while playing the 8 track with songs that favor that type of doohickey.

Answer 13

As it so happens, I was just reading a news story on this very subject:



In a bulletin from the Culinary Institute of America (CIA), gentlemen are now advised to consume daily servings of squid to achieve greater contentment in life. Says lead researcher Dr John Johnson, "In our studies both squid and opossum worked well, but we eventually favoured the squid because it caused less sluggishness in our subjects." While not everyone agrees with the findings, local owner of the brothel "The Stalactite" hopped right on board. He endorses, "We started serving this stuff and business just erupted, so to speak. Things haven't been better since I started playing Queen on the ol' 8-track!"



Fascinating, really.

Answer 14

A tall, handsome gentleman walked into a brothel and went up to a room. When he opened the door, there was an 8-track playing and a big opossum lying on the bed. "WTF?" he yelled. "I was expecting to see beaver!" He went down to the main desk to complain. Sitting there was a giant squid. "Whoa," he said, shaking his head. "They must have slipped some magic mushrooms into my vichysoisse when I had dinner at the Culinary Institute of America." The giant squid reached out its 50 foot tentacles and extended its 6 foot long stalactite-shaped penis and began to copulate with the man. The entire content of gooey semen erupted from its ejaculatory duct and coated the man from head to toe. Sluggish, he tried to crawl to the front door but the squid was too strong and pinned him down. Suddenly the Queen of the brothel appeared, and bashed the squid on the head with a ginormous dildo. The squid keeled over dead. The Queen handed the dildo to the man and said, "I've done you a favor, now you've got to do one for me.."

Answer 15

Tom the opposum staggered sluggishly to his den after the party celebrating his graduation from the Culinary Institute of America. He was content to watch the stalactites on the ceiling spin (he'd had one too many mugs of his favorite berry beer) when his friend Queenie Squid banged on his door. She had come to tell him that, at the brothel down the road, a gentleman had come to the door selling 8-track tapes! Rays of joy erupted from Tom's face since he seriously lamented the fade of 8-tracks from popular culture.



hope you like it!:)

Answer 16

the GENTLEMAN from the CULINARY INSTITUTE OF AMERICA is actually the QUEEN of the BROTHEL,

and cooks OPOSSUM and tells people it is SQUID, while he plays music from his SLUGGISH 8-TRACK player

while water from the STALACTITE drips its CONTENT and enhances the ERUPTED flavor of the soup as a FAVOR

Answer 17

This is more than a paragraph, actually two, or three or more, but I had fun with it,and, in the spirit of the directions, kept it in one paragraph. One big paragraph.



The year is 2014. Brittany Spears sluggishly pours herself a mug of black coffee and wonders what happened with her life. She was the star,the golden glittery rich one, yet her beauty, her talent, and the contents of her bank account do not impress her sons one jot. They want to live with their dad, Kevin Federline. Years ago, way back in the year 2006, when Brittany kicked Kevin out, Kevin smarted up to the fact that if he wanted to be involved in his sons lives he would have to prove to a judge that he was able and fit for the raising of sons. So Kevin became domesticated. He cleaned, he dusted, he bought 8-track tapes instead of CDs to show he could make a dollar yelp, and he learned to cook. Kevin found he enjoyed cooking enormously and nobody jeered him when they tasted what came out of his kitchen. When Kevin received a lump sum from Brittany in the divorce he used it to enroll himself into the "Culinary Institute Of America" where he graduated with honors at the top of his class. Not only did Keven graduate from "The Institute" they offered him a job there as professor, which he gladly accepted, as having a steady job looked wonderful in the eyes of the court.

When word of his tasty talent erupted around the world, Kevin became known as The Gentleman Chef and was invited to participate in an Iron man competition, the winner of which received the honor of cooking for The King and Queen Of England, Elizabeth having retired in William's favor so she could play with her great-grandchildren. Kevin accepted, thinking cooking for the Royals of England would look good in the eyes of the court. When Kevin made the Mystery Ingredient, Opossum meat, taste like squid, he was declared the winner, and was sent packing to Merry ole England. The meal he cooked there was so tasty that it brought an immediate job offer as the Royal couple's personal chef. Kevin turned it down thinking that living in another country would not look good in the eyes of the court. Wanting to do something for the man who had made their taste buds sing, Kevin was given the Royal Favor of having a title bestowed upon him. Henceforth he was known as Sir Keven Federline, Gentleman Chef. Kevin accepted the title thinking it would look good in the eyes of the court. Back to 2014, Brittany pours herself another cup of coffee and sighs. While the scum she divorced has a prestigious job, and a title, and is smiled upon by the eyes of the court, the highlight of her career so far was performing in an actual cave for a group of Goths and being knocked unconscious by a falling stalactite..which would not have been so bad, but she had been wearing almost see through clothing and was not wearing any underwear,which would not have been so bad, but she fell into a pool of cave water which made her almost see through clothing, very see through, which would not have been so bad, but in the audience was Perez Hilton which would not have been so bad, but he had a camera, which would not be so bad but he had a front row seat, which would not be so bad but he is the author of a gossip site which has a huge following. That episode did not look good in the eyes of the court. And she is still trying to live down the episode involving the brothel and the activities she was photographed doing there...the eyes of the court glared a mighty glare. But that sordid story is for another day.

Answer 18

No.